To have experienced real healing, it feels as though people look at me as if I’m crazy when I speak on it! I am made to think that my belief in God isn’t real. I’m not about the hype (traditions), and at times I’m told that I take the word to literally. I’m not free to believe in my God because this God isn’t theatrical. He doesn’t zap our blessing into place for show or fame. Instead, He moves in silence. In those still quiet moments, God can perform the greatest miracles. It requires sacrifice and obedience. Through the cost, God weighs us to see who is fit and who isn’t. The price that He is asking for is that we turn away from our flesh. We will have to deny our very nature to take on something unnatural. God doesn’t appear in a way that is “normal” because It would be close to what already exists. God appears in a form that will force you to stop! He will appear in a way that will make you question and open the eyes of both non-believers and believers.
My healing from depression was at a time that I wasn’t expecting. It happened on one of the dreariest days. God took a rainy and cloudy day to show me life. That sounds crazy, but it’s true. I still remember like it was yesterday. I was driving down a long curvy road, and alongside it was cherry blossom trees. At that moment, that tree was so vibrant, and it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I sit here and pondering on the fact that until the moment he freed me, I had no idea that I suffered from depression. I came to realize that for years, my perception of life was foggy. I didn’t know that life could be anything different. I thought I was living a life that was accurate to every other being on this earth. Until God showed me something different, it was in that instant that I believed that there is a God. This God saw me, and He loved me because who else could have showered me with love other than the true living King. At that moment, He existed, and He was real.
"At that moment, that tree was so vibrant, and it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen." -Makeya Kinard
I may be too imaginative at times, but I know that my God exists. I am free from depression, and it showed me that I could only be whole when I know Jesus. My depression derived from the fact that I struggled with my identity. I thought human relations was what I needed to be made whole. Rejection and walking in so much shame and guilt blinded me. My path was no longer clear, and I struggled with acceptance. Then one day, I was reminded that who better to tell you of your worth than Jesus. He faced the most significant rejection of all, but He never lost sight of the cross. He didn’t allow this world to dim His light.
Knowing who you are in Christ establishes your purpose. You began to realize you’re security because our God is never changing and everlasting. When you know that, you believe in your mission regardless of rejection or hurt and pain. Beyond a reasonable doubt, you know that God cares for you. With the power of Jesus, you can withstand all fiery darts that may come your way.
God isn’t here for blessings; He wants to fill your life with purpose. Your purpose drives testimony. Your testimony makes God real, and it shows how God can make the impossible possible. You shower others with hope. Our lives here on earth may be short-lived, but when we know who to put first, you are making way for yourself and others to experience eternity in heaven.